It's human nature to remember the bad

We received ICASS survey comments this week.  You may remember that I wrote about this earlier.  The ICASS survey helps me, as a service provider, get a feel for what problems there are in the community, and how we can better serve them.

The problem with the ICASS survey is also the main strength as well: The Anonymity of it all.  People can bash you all the want and have no fear of retribution.  So while this is a good idea, it also allows people who feel agrieved to get all their frustrations out and sometimes not tell the whole truth about things that have happened.

I've been doing this for 13 years now, and the ICASS survey comments are almost always something that I dwell on.  It's human nature to do that.  Nevermind that my section hasn't grown at all this year, but the Consulate doubled in size.  Nevermind that the majority of the comments left were very good and even the some of the negative comments were very constructive.  Nope, I focused on the really negative ones.

That's human nature.  It's the way that the brain is wired to work.  We can never remember the good, but we always remember the bad.  When I was in High School, I failed Algebra II.  I remember that, and the teacher telling me that maybe I wasn't smart enough to be in the IB classes.  (BTW, I got my IB diploma.  Just Saying.)  I'll always remember that.  Or how people tried to cheer me up after I failed by cheerleading my doing well in History.  They were probably trying to help, but it felt a little condescending.  I'm good in History.  That's my thing.  I just can't stand Math.  I'm a Math agnostic.  If you say x+2x+5x=y+3, I'll say I believe you.  (I think the correct answer to this is x=y+3/8, but I'm not sure.  Someone help me out here.)  Also about 6 years ago in Luxembourg we had a Team Building exercise when I first arrived.  One of the things to do was say 3 nice things about someone next to you, and one negative.  For the life of me I can't tell you what the positives were, but I remember the negative: My tie didn't match my shirt.

Anyways, I will always take these comments hard.  Not because I believe them, but because I'm genuinely trying to help people.  It's not easy living in another country.  Moving house every 2-3 years, changing your kids' schools, trying hard to fit into a new culture, flying over 15 hours just to get back to the States.  I get it. So many people take out their frustrations on the only thing they can: The Management section.  That's part and parcel of my job.  But I wish many of these people also had the common courtesy to come and talk to me about their problems.  I have open office hours, and everyone in the mission is invited to my Management Meetings.

Oh well.  We're the only people that actually get critiqued by our co-workers on how we're doing.  Maybe I'll sneak into their offices and leave anonymous notes critizing their work habits or their outputs.